Junie

My brother, Dr. Vito A. Perriello Jr. of Charlottesville, Virginia died unexpectedly on March 1, 2009. In the last few weeks before he died I had shared my blog with him and he had become quite a fan. I am, therefore, publishing this blog today in honor of him. It represents remarks I made at his funeral.


As we gather to celebrate the life of the good doctor, we acknowledge that the unthinkable has occurred. Our patriarch, husband, father, grandfather, brother, uncle, Doctor, and friend is gone. We ask how can this be? How can it be explained? But we know that there is no way to explain it. There is no way to understand it.

We do better, I believe, to remember all that he meant to us, his importance in our lives, and how he will always remain a part of us. For me, he was my brother. We called him Junie, because he was a junior. Together with my sister Mary Louise, we had a shared history of growing up together in Dunbar, West Virginia. The truth is I idolized him. He was my big brother and he could do no wrong. I would follow him wherever he would lead. Whenever we would go together to do a mushud (family members will know what I mean by mushud) I would just hang back and wait for him to take care of any business that needed to be handled.

At some point I recognized that I would never be able to function as an independent individual unless I separated myself a bit and struck out on my own. I'm guessing some of his children may have experiencd just a bit of this also. He was a larger than life figure that could at times seem even a little intimidating, yet he always wanted only what was best for each of us. He made himself available to assist us with any need we might have.

His family was central to everything he did. He created traditions to hold the family together, and was never happier than when all members of the family were enjoying being together and spending time together. My own children always checked with him whenever they were sick. My daughter Marites, who can't stand being anywhere near a doctor would always want to know what her Uncle Junie had to say about any illness she had or thought she had. Both Marites, and my son, JoJo, would call him for advice when they were sick without even telling us that they were going to call. They trusted and felt comfortable and reassured going to him when they had a need. Sometimes, my wife Norma would call to ask Junie for advice and he would tell her what he had already suggested to the children. She would ask how he knew that Marites was sick and he would tell her that she had called him the night before.

He loved and lived life to the fullest. We shared many of the same interests, including music, sports, and food. Yet his interests were always so much more intense than mine. He had such a zest for life. He enjoyed everything he did, and put everything he had into it. For example, I enjoy listening to an old Louis Armstrong recording. Junie heads off to jazz camp in Vermont. I also enjoy watching the Baltimore Ravens on TV. Junie, instead, would be using his season tickets for Virginia games in lacrosse, basketball, and football. Important games would see him on the road catching all the action live. The only area where I could probably keep up with him would be food, and we won't go there this morning.

And so we say good bye to Junie. We know he's already up there watching over us. We know he will always be with us. Soon he will be nudging and encouraging Linda to quit being so sad and to get up and go on with her life. He is still here keeping an eye on Elizabeth and Bo's wonderful children. You know he will be watching each grand child as they grow and develop, and he will be cheering and swelling with pride at each of their accomplishments. He's also going to be watching Paige with pride as she continues in the practice that has meant so much to him. And as for Congressman Tom, he will certainly be pushing him hard to do a great job in the Congress of the United States.

Finally, he will also be rejoicing as he enters those pearly gates and reconnects with family and friends. And he will be doing one other thing too. In the words of an old Negro spiritual that he loved to sing since we were kids, "All God's children got shoes. And when I gets to heaven, I'm gonna put on my shoes, and I'm gonna walk all over God's heaven"